Torture Of One's Heart
by klcm
Summary: Morgan takes a new job to stop himself loving Garcia but it all soon back fires on him
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds

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Derek,

So you left with the promise to come back, but you haven't been back and you're too busy to even answer my calls so I leave voicemail after voicemail with the anticipation that I'll get a call back but I don't. I just wanted to hear your voice, other than you telling me to leave a message after the beep.

I don't understand what I did to make you just forget me and I don't know why I didn't see it coming really. You and me, best friends for life, that was always a laughable matter for the outside world. Now I see why. The jock and the geek spells disaster from the word go that does.

So I hear a girl takes precedence in your world now, nothing stays secret in this place, grapevines are busy. Well keep it going Derek, you deserve to love a woman with all that heart of yours. I suppose I can't have the love I want but seeing as I'm single again we'll see what I get eh? After Kevin I think I'll settle for no one and yes you read that right, I dumped Kevin and you're the first to know. Case closed.

I won't call again Derek; it's obvious I hold no part in your life so I won't keep pushing a part in it. You've given me so much to live for and I pray that you live a long and happy life and that after all that pestering from your mom, you give those her grandbabies.

Count this as a final goodbye and just because this failed me, don't let it fail you:

_The heart gets what the heart wants._

Garcia.

_**A/N:**_ So I'm in an angsty romantic kind of mood, to go wtih the others!! This one won't be long unless the muse canters into action and has a bright spark but for now its small =)

Lemme know what you think!!


	2. Departure

Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds

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'A new job?' Penelope asked stunned. 'Where?'

'Chicago.' Derek said back, he saw Penelope's look but he couldn't be swayed by that, not when he had nothing to live for in Quantico really. 'I'll be closer to my mom and sisters, it'll work well.'

'Seems our banters a definite gone then eh?'

'We'll have the phone.' He teased, trying to lighten the mood.

'You'll be Mr. New Guy, no need for me; there'll be a new gal in your life.' Penelope offered him a smile; she tried to beam but failed. 'You'll love being back where you grew up.'

'I guess.'

'Why the pessimism?' She asked, her hands going to her hips in an instant.

'You don't sound that happy really baby girl.' He said, using a nickname he hadn't used in a while he had to admit. 'I thought you'd be happy.'

'I am! Don't get me wrong, I'm losing my best friend that's all.'

'There's the phone, and weekends, and holidays.' He told her, trying to keep it as positive as possible. 'It'll work.'

'Course it will sugar pop.' She told him and perked up as she heard Kevin's droning voice getting closer as he called her. 'Seems my ride home's here.' She kissed Derek's cheek. 'When do you leave?'

'Friday, start new post Monday.'

'That's 2 days.'

'Wednesday night film fest?'

'As ever.' Penelope replied as he dodged her shock the best he could. 'I'll see you later.' She then walked away towards Kevin, leaving Derek to just watch her be eloped into the man's arms.

At that moment Derek felt his heart clench in his chest, the sight in front of him was one reason he'd taken the job so easily. He was in love with a woman that'd been taken for nearly 3 years and the thing that still got him more than anything was the fact that he'd been there first so she should be his.

She didn't even realise what she did to him, what he grown to know as normal over the years, all she knew was that he was Derek Morgan, the man in her life that loved danger, had a hero complex but what she didn't know was that he'd pulled back from her, by taking the job, first as unit chief, then in Chicago and gone with Tamara to make her notice him. He also knew that she'd never understand that the only way he used her to help in dangerous situation and the reason he put himself in those predicaments was for her to notice him, to realise that he stood right there and that he loved her.

But then he realised none of those actually worked, so he gave up, he'd always love her that much was true but he'd never have her so he didn't bother to continue to strive for her attention. He didn't want to come second best anymore to Lynch; he was still conditioned to being her hot stuff, her angel, her noir hero.

He gave up working efficiently as his time loomed closer to an end at the BAU, he couldn't even bare to quit fully, Hotch had given him the chance, that if at the end of the 3 months he disliked his place was his if he so wished. He said he liked that offer, but inwardly decided that if no change had happened with Penelope and Kevin he wasn't moving back, he'd move forward at the post in Chicago, pursue it to as high as he could.

The biggest killer came when he was on a case come Wednesday and he had to cancel with Penelope, in a way it was torture as well as a heaven sent gift. He didn't have to pretend to not like her more than he should, he didn't have to hold back like he would've.

Come Friday, she was there at the airport with the others saying their farewells. He hugged her tightly, kissed her head multiple times, just hanging on a thread of hope that she might suddenly realise and plead with him to not go but it didn't happen.

Little did he know was that she lingered there long after he'd gone, well after the others had left for the cars. She just walked up to the window and watched as the plane readied, she even stayed there as the plane got ready to depart. It was as it separated from airport building that her eyes finally freed the tears. She watched the one man leave that she loved and she hadn't even told him what he truly meant to her. A case had swamped them in the last cherished days she had had with him and now he was gone.

Separating their lives with it. They weren't a duo any more, even if that had been wearing thin since he took the job as acting Unit Chief but they were able to build on that and recuperate and then maybe then she would've told him what he meant to her.

But clearly this movement to leave just showed her how damaged they were, how irrecoverable they were. With that thought in mind she turned and walked out of the airport, her head sunk, her shoulders dropped. She'd probably class this as one of the worse days of her life.

Wearing her heart on her sleeve she got into her car and started the engine, driving home, she knew she'd find Kevin but right then and there, Kevin wasn't who she wanted.

Derek looked out of the window of the plane, and he could swear he saw Penelope there, a hand to glass as the plane departed. He shook his head, she wouldn't have waited that long there for him, there wasn't a point. With the day off, she'd want to go to Kevin, not hang around in an airport.

'You look a little distant there.' A seductive voice came from the seat next to him. 'Sorry, I didn't mean to pry.' She said and Derek turned to see a elegantly gorgeous afro-American woman sitting next to him. 'Rachel.'

'Derek.' Derek told her back, almost snappy. 'Sorry.'

'No problems, something eating you away.' She near enough purred with sympathy. 'I saw you at the check in, had a lot of stuff. Moving?'

'Yeah, could say that.'

'Maybe, we could meet up once we're in Chicago, have a drink.'

'I would love to.'

'But... you're already taken.'

'Yeah.' Derek said back, stunned into silence that he'd just said he was in a relationship. A total lie but then again she was a total stranger she'd just met on the plane.

'No worries, lucky woman that's all I can say.' She said and then scrawled on the back of her magazine and tore it off before handing it over. 'Ever want a drink, just call.' She said with a smile and opened the magazine to read.

Derek looked at the piece of paper in his hands and smiled, his steps to a new beginning had just began.


	3. Hitting You Hard

Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds

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'Will you give it a rest?' Kevin asked as he paced Penelope's apartment. 'He left Penelope, over 2 months ago, give it a rest will you.'

'Give it a rest?' Penelope said snappily. 'Give it a rest? No I won't Kevin.'

'He left so you wallow!'

'You know what Kevin, if him upping and leaving has shown me something its what I want in life!'

'What's that suppose to mean?'

'I don't want this anymore, we're not going anywhere, we haven't for a while, we fight, we argue, I hate your habit of biting your nails, it actually makes me sick and I can't do this anymore.'

'Fine! But you'll regret it Penelope! You can't survive without me and you know it!'

'I can't survive without you? I survived pretty okay without you before I met you.'

'So much so you got yourself shot.' Kevin spat out at her and regretted it immediately. 'Penny, I'm sorry.'

'No you're not, you're just saying that. Is that what you've thought all along? Since we met, that I'm the tech that got myself shot?'

'No, no way.' He tried to back track. 'I love you remember.'

'Get out Kevin, you just proved to me everything you think so get out, post my stuff I've got at yours back to me and leave me the hell alone!'

'Penny! Can we not try and work this out.'

'No!' Penelope said back adamantly and went and grabbed some of his things. 'Take your things Kevin and leave.'

'You can't just end this like this.'

'I can and am.' She said and silenced herself until he was gone and out of her apartment. When he was and silence settled instead of the hustle and bustle and the sound of mad dashing's to grab things Penelope sank and broke down.

It was a time like this she'd just pick the phone up, call Derek's number and tell him and feel better, grabbing her phone she called him, not surprised to get voicemail. When her turn to speak came she just froze.

'I give up.' She said and closed her phone in admittance to defeat; her tears came thicker and faster now. She'd lost two men from her life at once, although Derek had gone a long time ago that was for sure.  
Deciding on her next action, she knew she needed a release, a way to close a door in order to open another so she grabbed a pad and pen and wrote out her final goodbye.

Satisfied somewhat with its contents she got up and went and put it in an envelope. Writing the address she had for Derek, she sealed it and went to post it. Then as she watched it fall into the mail box, she didn't feel a release or a chapter closed, her heart just broke even more than it already was.

Derek looked around his apartment, it was bland and even though it housed him and Clooney it lacked something else, the one thing Penelope gave his place in Quantico, presence. It'd been 2 months and even though he'd started a relationship, he was only damaging himself more and more. He was only hurting himself.

He loved the fact that his family were close but he hated that the one person that chased nightmares and cured his tortured soul was so far away, he hated that he'd left and he was finding it regrettable but had to do what was right for him and this, in the long run, would be right for him.

Now he looked at the envelope that had come in the post, he hadn't opened it in the 3 days he'd had it. He knew the writing, signature baby girl script scrawled on the front. At first he was going to burn it, he had already cut most contact with her out in order for him to move on but no, that break hadn't come, it became crushing.

He looked at his phone, 6 voicemails, that had stayed that way for a good solid 5 days and now he wondered why so he sorted the phone and played it aloud. Sitting back he waited for it to play out.

'_Hi, I guess you're busy, some job eh? Well I hope you're enjoying it handsome and yeah hope you're fitting in.' He heard her laugh. 'Guess you are seeing as I'm leaving yet another voicemail. I'll talk to you soon, bye.'_

He sighed; she sounded so off from her usual self. He waited as the next message played.

'_Quantico's pining for you hot stuff, we miss you, I heard you spoke to the guys today. Reid's moods picked up again. Thanks for doing that for him, he needed it. I guess I missed the call but, yeah, I'll talk to you whenever.'_

He had deliberately skipped her, for fear he'd want to just run back to her. Her voice was so different to his normal vibrancy and that worried him.

'_Mon Cheri, I miss you, more than you'll ever know. I just hope Chicago knows what a great person they have back. Bye.' _

Derek sat up; he could hear yelling in the back of that one. Kevin's yelling.

'_I could really use a Derek Morgan talk after that case. I could really use just a talk all round at the moment really. But you Derek Morgan continue having a ball and keep safe please.'_

He needed Penelope Garcia talks to but they were a rarity now.

'_I'm seriously going out of my mind; I just need to hear your voice.' He heard her sniff and her voice shake. 'I need to know you're safe, but I guess that doesn't really matter now. I'm not going to say I miss you, because it just hurts, I'm not going to say I'm worried you're hurt, I know you're not, you spoke to others today. Come for a visit soon please.'_

Derek fell back against the sofa and ran a hand over his head, what was he doing to her.

_There was a long pause, just shallow tear felt breathing. 'I give up.'_

He shot back up again. She gave up. Gave up on what? With that thought he grabbed the envelope and ripped it open, his heart beat was literally in his throat as he did and then it dropped and shattered. As he pulled the letter out, the light glinted on metal and his eyes welled as he saw the necklace he'd gotten her. The one engraved with the one word that meant she was his.

Baby girl.

He tore the letter apart to read and he shook as he read it. _I don't understand what I did to make you just forget me_. Derek felt angered, he hadn't meant for her to feel like that, anything but that and now she was doubting him. _I suppose I can't have the man I want to_; the man she wants? His confusion peaked then, who did she want, Kevin was her one. _I dumped Kevin_; there was the gate way he wanted. _I won't call again Derek_. His heart clenched again, that's why there'd been a halt to all calls and then he read on: _Count this as a final goodbye and just because this failed me, don't let it fail you: The heart gets what the heart wants. _Was that her saying that she was in love him here? Or was he just hoping? Derek stood up at that point; his thoughts were killing him now and then the signed name at the bottom. _Garcia._ Never had she signed things that way to him, now he realised how wrong he'd been to leave.


	4. Realisation Of The Hearts

Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds

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Penelope needed the time off, she needed to kick herself out of her mood, she needed to move on, straighten up and get over it all. So when Hotch gave them the time after this case she didn't question it, she just took the time.

Now 2nd night in and she was wandering around her apartment with only one light on. Getting a drink from the fridge she shut it and was met by Derek's smiling face. She put her fingers to it and felt her heart cramping in her chest. If at night it wasn't the nightmares of the case that kept her from sleeping, then it was emptiness that now consumed her.

'I hate you.' She said to the picture and then pulled it off, as her knees went weak and she had to sit down. As she sat on the floor of her kitchen and cried all that she could think was that everyone she truly loved always left her. First were her parents, and now her best friend was gone, the people that she relied on, the three people that had always made it easy for her to just talk to, to confide in.

She knew she didn't hate Derek, it was his life to live, not hers but she always saw his departure as a fault in their relationship and at the end of the day it came down to the status of their friendship. It wasn't some chemical reaction that every spoke of, there wasn't any chemistry binding the pair of them, they weren't soul mate best friends, they were just two people that met and that grew apart.

Now finding herself on the floor, and realising how ridiculous she was being over a man she knew she needed to suck it up. In the first month that he was gone, the calls were in huge quantities, by week 3 they were whittling away and by the 5th week she knew why his tone and his conversation was wearing thin. He'd lost interest, he was cutting ties.

Derek stilled himself outside Penelope's apartment, he thought he was going crazy, here he was back in the one place he felt at home, at nearly 4am in the morning and he was standing outside a building that housed the one woman he'd come to love, the woman that'd cut herself from him, given him the release he yearned undesired for.

Walking in, he traced his ghost footsteps that he'd made over the years and found her door, he heard a muffling noise inside and then braced himself. Bringing his hand to knock he stopped, he was completely crazy if he did this but if there was one thing Penelope Garcia did for him, it was making him crazy.

He knocked, his signature knock, that he only used for her and the muffling stopped. Little did he know was that Penelope was now frozen on the floor staring at the door, thinking she was starting to hear things, that her mind was playing tricks on her.

'Come on Baby Girl.' Came a strong voice, the voice that guided her through her days when she'd seen one too many things. Well the voice that had once guided her, she didn't have him as a safety net anymore. 'Pen, let me in.' She heard him say and she could swear that even through the wood and concrete of the building that he was close to tears. 'Please.'

At his plead she slowly stood up and went to the door, she put her hand on it, and just stood there. 'Please.' He second again and she unlocked it before opening it a little bit. 'Pen, Baby Girl, please let me in, I need to talk to you.'

'Why now?' She said almost angered, he'd walked out of her life and now he was walking back in, just as she had got herself ready to make a new path to get over it all. She looked at the broken man in front of her. 'Now you call the shots you want in?'

'Penelope, please... let me explain.'

'Derek you left.' She said as hot salted tears pricked her eyes. 'You even left the state and you cut me off, you called the others but never me!'

Derek used force at that moment to get into the apartment, to quieten her argumentative moment that was about occur. 'Think how I felt ignoring you.' He said calmly, quietly as he shut the door.

'Thing was, you didn't have to ignore me!' She said, her arms motioning with her aggression. 'What did I do to bear the brunt of your attitude Derek? What did I do that was so bad that I got exiled from the wonderful bloody life of Derek Morgan?'

'Went off with another man that's what you did!' Derek said voicing the main reason for why he'd left. 'You and Kevin fucking Lynch is what happened!'

'What?' She said taken back by the declaration.

'You got shot, the night I got you out of that hospital I told you I loved you and you told me loved me back but really you can't have seeing as you went off with Lynch.'

'You meant that?'

'How else was I supposed to mean it?' Derek asked her completely deflated at the turn of events. 'If I tell you 'hey Silly Girl, I love you, you know that right?', you gonna take that as I'm just casually trying to cover something up, or that I just tell girls that?' Derek told her with conviction. 'You know I don't trust people easily! Hell, at times I wouldn't trust the team but you, you I trust with everything.'

'Derek...'

'No! You can listen! You know me the most P, you know that I have flings but you know that I'd never ever tell them I love them.'

'What made me so different?'

'Everything made you different.' He said and stepped forward with an almost predator glare glinting his eyes. 'You're the only girl I've ever said I love you too and meant it with my entire heart, body, soul, the whole of me. Doesn't that tell you something?'

'That you're obviously blind as well as stupid.' Penelope said distantly, her arms wrapping around herself protectively. As if she'd finally realised that she was standing there in front of him braless in a strappy vest and pyjamas bottoms covered in multicoloured flowers. Now she was glad she'd not gone for her worn out pair, or the ones covered in kittens or even the ones covered in the word hot stuff.

'Blind and stupid? I don't understand.' He asked her completely confused.

'Have you ever looked at me, ever looked at why I don't get the pick of the men? Why girls make comments? Why I hide under my personality?'

'Don't go there Penelope.'

'I'm ugly Derek, I'm not physically attractive, I'm mentally annoying to most and I'm...'

'Don't you dare say you're fat.'

'Well you noticed then eh?' Penelope said, trying to hide her tone. 'Why did you really come here Derek? After 2 months what made you come here? Was it my lack of attention on you with the pathetically never ending phone calls or the letter?'

'Was those, and you want to know that brought me back the most?' Penelope shrugged at him. 'You dumping a certain little geeky weasel.'

'3 years Derek, 3 poxy years you had to just get me out of that.'

'Just get you out of it? You were in a relationship! How do you just get out of that?'

'By having this chat way back when. By getting me out of the biggest mistake of my life.'

'Biggest mistake? Baby, I thought you were happy.'

'Oh I was besides the nasty snipes about my relationship with you and how I was a workaholic, and the annoying habits that drove me insane.' Penelope said and began to pace. 'How stupid do I feel right now?'

'Why? Pen you have nothing to feel stupid for.'

'Oh, so me going with Kevin when I could've had you doesn't seem ridiculous and I mean I just got shot... maybe that's it, maybe the fact that a second smoking hot guy was interesting me scared the hell out of me.'

'It scared you? The idea of me loving you scares you?'

'For Christ sake Derek, the first one wanted me dead! There was no love interest there at all.' She ran her hands over her head; she remembered being shot like it had happened yesterday, every single pain and emotion that came with it. 'Kevin was the easy way to run.'

'Stop running.'

'Pardon?'

'We've wasted too long running from this baby girl. Much too long.' He said and stepped closer to her, a different look in his eyes, one that she remembered all too well. 'Stop being scared.'

'Derek...'

'No... shh...' He told her and took her in his arms. 'Do the one thing you've wanted to do all along Baby Girl.' He guided her and Penelope gave in, she'd already lost him, he'd moved on.

'You're with someone.'

'Finished, it was wrong... just trust me.' He told her confidently but saw her hesitating. 'Fine follow my lead.' He said and finally kissed her the way he'd yearned to for years, he smiled inwardly as she kissed him back, her hands running the length of his body, deepening the kiss, keeping it going, allowing it to gather momentum.

Now he'd finally gotten what he'd been running from and he wasn't going to let it go.


	5. Stopping The Torture

Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds

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Penelope pushed Derek off her and could feel the tears streaming down her face. 'You left me.' She told him bitterly, she was hurting and however much she wanted to just wrap him up in her arms and allow him to kiss her senseless , she had to know he was going to just leave again. 'You've got a new job Derek, you left all of this.'

'I know, I know, but it was all because of you.' He saw her look at him shocked and she stepped away from him. 'Because I love you silly girl, always have and I'm sure as hell always gonna.'

'You can't expect me to believe all that mumble jumble, I destroyed my relationship with Kevin because I couldn't stop loving you! It's all your fault that I've lost everything that makes me, me. It's your fault that I'm walking around my apartment come 4 o'clock in the morning and it's your fault for making me love you more than I should.' She said and broke down freely, feeling Derek wrap his arms around her she tried to push and shove him away, all Derek did was keep his grip on her. 'Derek, let me go.'

'No.'

'Derek!' She growled at him.

'No, I said no baby girl. I left and it seems I took more with me than I deserved and I'm back, I resigned, but I'm back and you know this as much as I do.'

'I can't.'

'What?' He said and made the gap between them bigger.

'I can't just love you because you broke away from me, made me doubt what we've bought up for 8 years, made me question who you really are.'

'Who I really am? I'm a man that's in love with you and only you.'

'You gonna keep saying that?' Penelope asked and put her head sideways.

'Until you believe me Goddess, 2 months, is too long, 3 years is murder but then so is 8 years, it's almost apocalyptic... the moment you gave me that little grin of yours I knew you'd taken my heart, I knew I'd trust you and every day I loved the fact that you were my Baby Girl.' He said and pulled the necklace from his back pocket. 'My Baby Girl.' He repeated with so much emotion that Penelope swore her heart skipped a beat, they her blood pressure rose with the intensity that grew in the room.

Penelope stood in front of Derek, her mouth slightly ajar, almost in anticipation of another kiss that would show the wrath of Derek's soul, her hands hung dead and limp besides her as she just stared at him, her heart beating so hard she could swear that if it went a step higher it thrash my her chest.

'So...' Derek said as he kept himself back from grabbing what he wanted. 'You give up?'

There was a long pause. 'No.' Penelope finally said as her mind caught up. 'I gave up.' Derek's face fell, his confidence knocked right out of him. 'Now I've found a reason to carry on.'

Derek's mind caught up, throbbing as his heart began to pound, as the blood seemed to flow more freely throughout is entire body, he stepped forward and took Penelope's wanting body and pulled it against his. Again he captured her in a jaw locking kiss, one that she continued and encouraged comfortably.

This time it continued for a longer satisfying length before he took her to the bedroom and released anarchy. Derek's love flowed out in each new thrust he injected into Penelope, as their bodies merged over and over again and Penelope's lips let words of ecstasy and want and need slip from their fullness. It was as he pulled out the final time and then fell next to her satisfied with a grin on his face.

'That was the best thing I've ever done.' He said and pulled away; he rolled onto his side and looked at Penelope as she just stared up at the ceiling, tears pouring down her cheeks. 'Baby girl?'

'This was wrong.' She said and then she stood up, feeling ashamed almost embarrassed as she looked around for her pyjamas again. 'We shouldn't have done that.'

Derek shot up after her wounded. 'What?! Baby you cannot be seriously... I thought that's what you wanted.'

'That's everything I've wanted, I've wanted that for too long.'

'For too long? So what's wrong?'

'Look at what brought us to this point Derek! Look what happened to us to bring us here... you left for Chicago and I went with another man because we wanted to run.'

'Yeah we did, _did_, baby girl, they're behind us, made us realise what we wanted and made us go for what we want. But when you yelled my name while we made love I knew you knew it was right, we'd both given in and we both got what we've desired.' He saw her doubt him. 'Pen, please, don't do this, we've wasted too much time to start questioning this.'

'Derek, you left! I can't just get over that; I can't just not question that.' She looked away, the morning light slowly growing, silhouetting her more. 'I've seen what you do to women Derek; I can't survive being just a fling... I can't just be that, not after this.'

'Well don't be... I want you more than that, I thought today would've proven that.' He stepped closer, pulled her half naked body to his fully naked body. 'I thought what we just did would have proved that factor. I want that type of sex for the rest of my life.'

'That...' She said turning, their bare skin brushing against one another, the last remnants of sex sweat mingling more than it had. '...was basically make up sex.'

'Then we'll have to break up to make up eh baby girl?'

'Derek... really? Seriously, you want this? Want me?' She said and looked away; she felt every muscle on his chest and stomach against her skin. 'I'll never be like those girls. I'm me.'

'And I want you. Not them. I want Penelope Garcia, the sexy curvy mamma that's too sexual with her comments, that turns me on with her purr like seductive voice and the woman that's standing right in front of me now.'

'How can I not believe that?'

'Simple you can't.' He said and pulled her back to the bed where he tried again to show her his love, except this time when he rolled over she looked at him with a different look, one that showed him how much she really loved him, how there were no reservations to what had happened. She unlocked her heart from herself and given it to him and in return he'd done the same.

No longer were they allowing their hearts to be tortured.

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**The End!**

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_**A/N:**_ SO there it is... the end at last! =)

You want an Epilogue then lemme know and I'll see what the muse can handle =)

Thanks for all the great reviews!


	6. Epilogue

Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds

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EPILOGUE!

Penelope shuffled around hers and Derek's house she was beyond scared of him coming home, beyond any readable emotion really. She'd already cleaned the place, straightened every wrong angled ornament and now she was convinced Derek would believe she had OCD.

She heard the key slid into the door and braced herself, she couldn't get comfortable or look natural, she was just staring, frozen like a statue. She watched the boots get kicked off and the thud of the go bag hitting the wooden flooring of the hallway and then Derek's shadow chase across the wall. He then came into view and he froze as she stood still.

'Baby girl?' He asked questioningly with a large grin on his face, it'd been nearly 4 weeks since she'd last been held by him, yearned for him, begged him to complete her. 'What you doing up? It's gone 1 in the morning.'

'I'm restless.'

'I can tell.' He said and searched her face. 'What's a matter?'

'Nothing.' She bottled it.

'Penelope, we've been living together for 4 months now, been together a hell of a lot longer, I know how to read you. So what's wrong?'

'Don't hate me.' She said a little scared and she saw him begin to panic. 'Please.'

'Baby you're scaring me, what's a matter? Tell me now.'

'I'm...' She began but the words caught in her throat and she sucked in a deep breath and got over it. 'Pregnant.' She said and then watched Derek just still for what felt like an eternity before his face broke out into over bearing smile.

'Say it again...' He said as he stepped forward, closely the gap that was killing him.

'I'm pregnant.' She told him again, more freely this time. This time as the last letter slipped her tongue Derek picked her up and kissed her, keeping her as close to his body as possible.

'Why would I hate you for that?'

'Because I was on the pill, we weren't trying for a baby.'

'Who cares!' He proclaimed loudly and kissed her again. 'How long have you known?'

'About 2 weeks into the case, I skipped a period and I was worried.'

'How far gone?' He asked almost excitedly.

'Nearing 4 months.' She said and bite her lip, she still couldn't believe it that she was that far gone. 'Seems we did more than Christen this house that night handsome.'

'Seems we started a family too.' He said and kissed her again, he'd become insatiable all of a sudden. 'You've probably made me the happiest man on Earth Baby Girl.' He said and pulled away. 'Now to make you the happiest woman on Earth.'

'I already am.'

'Na uh.' He said and got down on one knee, pulling a box out of his back pocket he looked her dead in eyes. 'Penelope, will you do me the honour and marry me?'

Penelope didn't know if it was hormones or otherwise but right at that moment she wanted to burst out and cry, she began to nod her head and the nodding increased until her lips spoke the words they were meant to. 'Yes.' She said and he jumped up, pushing the ring on her finger all the while pulling her closer and closer to him.

As Derek held Penelope close he knew his life was on the right path, that all the upset and heart ache they'd suffered was meant to be, as Penelope always said, everything happens for a reason and how could he doubt that when he had a fiancée and a child on the way.

Torturing their hearts only strengthened what they knew and now he knew he had everything he's heart desired. 'I'm taking you to bed mamma. You, me and our child.' He said and led her to their bedroom.

-=-=-=-=-

_**A/N:**_ There's the epilogue everyone seemed to want! Hope you liked and thanks for all the reviews! =)


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